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Just as the rainbow is made up of many different  colours  so to our SELF is really the culmination of a variety of selves for example I am a daughter, sister, friend, neighbour, therapist, human rights advocate, trained mediator, love, Certified Employee Assistance Professional, nature lover, life coach, lover of Creative Arts, and so much more …. How would that read for you? What would your “I am” list be? 

Fly Well

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There is so much more to us than meets the eye in any one context. Our one context is like taking a closer look at one colour in our rainbow. It is definitely part of us yet just as definitely not all of us. Whenever we over exaggerate any one segment it results in a disproportionate rainbow. Yet we are always moving between the different colours of our rainbow or between the different selves. Sometimes we might run into emotional difficulties when experiences lead us to believe we MUST hide or deny aspects of our self. In such cases those aspects of self continue to impact us unconsciously and sometimes not in the best possible way. For example while I am assertive I can also be stubbornly steadfast being aware allows me to exercise both consciously yet if I accept my assertiveness and not that stubborn steadfast aspect it might arise at inopportune times and wreck havoc for some or all aspects of my self that is my self in different contexts. 

Enough is Enough

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So we are really at our absolute best to ourselves and to others when we EMBRACE all aspects of us all of our selves all our traits those we perceive as strengths and those we perceive as weakness. And when this happens others can look upon us and see our beauty more readily reflected just as we are able to enjoy the beauty of the rainbow. We are better able to to shine in our different contexts and to allow each aspect of our self to positively influence our self in another context. Have you seen your rainbow recently?       

When we decide to move into a particular profession there is something that pulls us. In FACT when we decide to pursue or accept to do a particular job there is something that pulls us. Even if we might readily recognize a need for money as a motivator, deeper exploration would bring forth some other pull to that particular job. Most times our pull is linked to some value.

Like everything in life nothing is absolute or completely linear. And so pulls toward a job or career might occur along a continuum since the pull is simply a sign of MOTIVATION.

MOTIVATION can go either way …. we might be motivated by a need to grow and develop … aka growth needs or we might be motivated by a need to feel better about ourselves due to some self-perceived lack aka deficit needs. This picture below served as a prompt for this blog and provides some ‘wicked humor’ while commenting on job career choice based on deficit needs.

Selecting Careers on Deficit!
Selecting Careers on Deficit!

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When motivated by growth needs there will be no IRONY OF LIFE with our job career selection but there will be instead Life of Vitality and so the above might read:

LIFE OF VITALITY

The lawyer helps …. You proof your case!

The doctor helps …. You improve your health!

The  police helps … You  become safe & secure!

The teacher helps … You learn and develop!

The landlord helps … You access shelter!

The dentist helps …. You preserve your teeth!

The mechanic helps … Your car drive well!

The coffin maker … wants your final rest to be decent!

                      Life of Vitality robs no one but enriches all with abundance and rewards in many different ways

So the million dollar question would be … what motivated you to select your job or career?

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“Intimate Partner Violence” (I.P.V.) describes physical violence, sexual violence, stalking and psychological aggression (including coercive acts) by a current or former intimate partner.

When we choose to enter an intimate relationship with another, the relationship develops a life of its own. Basically the life of the relationship is what happens and does not happen in the relationship  … no two relationships are the same and no relationship stays the same over time, for as one or both persons change so the relationship cannot help but be changed.

Why? Simply because the relationship is a reflection of the thoughts feelings, actions of each one in the relationship and a reflection of what there relationship was built upon and is based upon etc. 

With that being said a relationship is a PARTNERSHIP … this partnership develops during the INTERACTION so for violence of any form to enter the  INTERACTION of the PARTNERSHIP there must be an initial choice of ACTION by one PARTNER and a COMPLIMENTARY RESPONSE to that initial  ACTION of that other  PARTNER. So by the time the issue of “Intimate Partner Violence” (I.P.V.) arises in the RELATE-RELATIONSHIP IT IS HARDLY ABOUT THE PARTNER WHO IS GUILTY OF physical violence, sexual violence, stalking and psychological aggression (including coercive acts) BUT instead it is about a way of R-E-L-A-T-I-N-G  that has DEVELOPED within the  RELATIONSHIP that is COUNTER-PRODUCTIVE.

Truth is it is important for each and EVERY one of us to both know and establish our BOUNDARIES from early in relationships. 

Truth is the more we work at increasing self-love the better it is for both our intra-personal and inter-personal relationship. And then we would make a decision to continue or end particular relation-SHIPS by breaking the cycle either by considering and working for new ways of relating in the new relationship  to break violent patterns (and that would take two) or else by choosing to enter into relation-SHIPS that promote healthy non-violent ways of relating. 

Truth is relationships have a ‘Murphy’s Law’ factor … “If there are two or more ways to do something, and one of those ways can result in a catastrophe, then someone will do it that way,” we all then must beware and be mindful.

And it is well to remember to0 that  while LOVE is a POWERFUL experience, no man or woman is ours to POSSESS!

So sincerely hoping more and more of us will work to put a positive spin or redefine I.P.V and move toward Intimate Partner Vitality in our relationships! 

     

From inception to departure we are creating our C.D. AND NOT ONLY THAT we also determine how, where, when, to what extent, to whom, at what rate the contents of that C.D. is shared

It is our C.D. player and it is our C.D. being played …

So player, myself included, isn’t it well to consider the vast control that are within your reach, just consider each time you make a decision that is another part of your C.D. being recorded. Each time you make a decision it registers to the C.D. player as PLAY, FAST FORWARD or REWIND …

Play IS THAT steady flow of beautiful self-made music that flows and progresses and then moves easily into another song (phase/aspect of life)

Fast Forward is that racing that occurs when something has thrown us off balance and so there are moves that threaten to throw us off-course … Might be necessary then to take deep breathes and regain composure and appreciation for the wisdom of keeping a steady PLAY-flow

Rewind is when despite the pull of what might develop if we were to steadily work on our C.D. we return to the songs or a specific song that has gone before and delve into it … This might be one of those things that might work for better or for worse … what is remains in the hands of the player 

So as  we mossy on along do remember that it’s your C.D. and all yours to decide how you will C.reate D.estiny!!!!

HAPPY PRODUCTIONS!!!!!!!!!!!

For the love of what if we all recall

How our actions impact us all

We might work to forget what another has done

But forgetting is not truly possible for the brain is hard-wired to provide re-runs

And even if the events are not remembered exactly 

The felt experience is easy to source within the body

So for the love of please appreciate that 

when this figure is turned to lie flat,

It is the  sign of infinity which suggests something that goes on and on … 

So for the love of 

Think before you act for the impact of actions taken can be forgiven yet the impact of its easy recall is not  as easy to re-tract

So for the love of 8

Feel before you speak of how your words long after being spoken might play like a broken record in someone’s mind and disrupt a relationship that might have otherwise been quite fine

So for the love of 8

Experience thoroughly in your mind’s eye the impact of the choice you might make because of a THOUGHT that might not even be based on the facts … don’t let your THOUGHTS cause you to do something that other people for their lifetime might have to not so much as live but ‘bear’ through

For the love of 8

I do hope the idea behind this KarryOn Blog is one we all might appreciate!  

Earlier this week I was introduced to the meaning of the word copy-writing and later this week the issue of copy-righting was brought forward. Have heard much on this discussion and appreciate the need, the necessity of persons, entities protecting content. Yet have heard an interesting slant on the said discussion  about information availability and freedom of speech and the technicality of how a few tweaks here and there can make what was originally someone else’s content yours… For myself I believe … KarryOn supports and is guided by ethical operations hence any content that is not original is noted as such … yet to each his own 

These discussions though have led to some interesting concepts, questions, ideas … firstly, can anyone ever really copy-right your information … the thing is no one no matter how hard they try can do something exactly like you, even if they are very similar … so might a copy-right check for the copy-cat first and foremost be you being so full of yourself, so full of your essence, that someone who really is following, supporting, endorsing, seeking your services or products, is able to pick up quickly that while it looks, sounds, tastes, feels, provides a similar experience that there is still that ‘something’ that they cannot quite put a finger on that is missing, and then make a decision to look into it further and hopefully return right back to the original 

Secondly, for those who are tempted to infringe upon copy-right Laws … Might it be well to consider that you have deprived yourself of the RIGHT to: 

Create  content that is unique to you … that shows your take, your approach, your slant, you have infringed upon your right to basically be yourself and are operating from ‘borrowing an aspect of another’s self’  as it were

100% Original

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Operate ethically and at some point it will in some way ‘eat’ at you

Always Eat Well

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Purposeful living … which really comes from knowing you are providing something to the World that you can genuinely feel good about

A Place for All

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YOURSELF … AND who can really be copying-right when they are depriving themselves of themselves?  

The concept of the ‘ex’ is one that has made for many a memorable movie and popular pop songs … 

The reality of the ‘ex’ has led to difficulties in many a relationship … 

'Ex' marks many things but could a 'new' relationship really be one of those things?
‘Ex’ marks many things but could a ‘new’ relationship really be one of those things?

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Interestingly how we seem to take this concept of the ‘ex’ and accept it as the reality of what an ‘ex’ really is … 

The Oxford English Dictionary defines ‘ex’ as not including  or former a prefix meaning out … yet in many a movie or song or life in general the ‘ex’ is associated with the one who is very much included and is not ‘let go’ or ‘will not let go’ …. And of course  it begs the question of ‘Is this a true ‘ex’?

It would seem that many a time what passes for anex’ in a relationship, is simply a relationship triad, where either the supposed ‘ex’  continues along with the supposed newcomer either by the insistence of the ‘ex’ or the person who is mutual to both the ‘ex’ and the newcomer … And just to be clear there is no remote attempt at judgement here either way … but just a commentary on a very popular common relationship phenomenon …. And in case you might be wondering how this even came up … 

There is a song that has really caught my attention of late and it is not just the skill of the singer but the feel of the song and the words being sung … it is the peaceful resolve that is evident … the absence of bitterness … the acceptance of the past … the unspoken working through of the pain of disappointment in a love relationship … in other words it was the evident picture in this song of the rarely seen TRUE ‘EX’:

The term coach is brought to mind when we reflect on the Olympics or consider the Sporting Arena. 

Just as the sportsman and sportswoman benefits from working with their coach for desired results, as we journey through life we have certain desires in different arenas of our life: romantic life; financial life; social life; work life et. al. … and this is where your Life Coach comes into play.

Your Life COACH helps you to develop these different arenas of your life as you would like them to be, identifying areas where you want to reach your desired goals, and collaborating through an equal partnership to discover and develop these arenas and so create the life you desire now. 

In fact “Life Coaching is a powerful human relationship in which professionally trained coaches support persons to create their desired future.” Coaching might prove Therapeutic but It is not therapy! 

Coaching And Meaning

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Some things are therapeutic which is simply to say some things have a good effect on the body and/or mind

Of course, the word therapeutic originated from the word therapy which is essentially associated with the field of psychology and so all who are under this umbrella be they psychologists counsellors social workers et al.  are referred to as therapists it is only by further discussion that one becomes aware of the persons specifics.

And so it is that there are as many professional therapies as there are things that have been proven to have a good effect on the body or mind:

 Art Therapy; Creative Arts TherapyDrama Therapy; Massage Therapy; Psychological Therapy; Reiki Therapy; Spa Therapy  ….

And so it is too that over time we discover our own ‘personal therapies’ those things that we have proven over time to have a good effect on our body and/or mind:

Dancing; Exercise; Fishing; Jogging; Listening to Music; Quiet-Time; Walking;

And so after all is said and done we all at some point in time might well sing some of the words of a popular song …  “Like Breathe in (Breathe in)

Let it go (Shout it out)

Take deep breathes and real slow, calm down.

Close my eyes (soft spoke)

Ease my mind (take control)” … as we benefit from what can best be described as Simply Therapeutic