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playing sports

Internet Ablaze with Curry

Seems Ayesha Curry really ‘set it off’ for couples as well as singles … talking about;

  1. her husbands female fans
  2. her thinking “hmm would be nice to get some of that attention from men”

Discussions going from, these women cannot get enough, Ayesha is beautiful and gets attention, Steph Curry and Ayesha are childhood sweethearts, Steph supports his wife and on and on…

Turning to the remaining Curry

Let’s put this in context…

Steph Curry is a sportsman, an active attractive sportsman and that is where we really must begin .. because let’s be real as attractive as Steph is his appeal is a lot to do with him being a popular sportsman

And here is where sportspeople spouses would want Curry favour

The head of the sportsman is different

So we casually say we think with our heads, but we all know its really our brains.

Well guess what…sportspeople have specialized brains as do all people who tend to gravitate to certain things, just as musicians and artists

The sportsman head and what it means for relationships

Our brains are constantly moving chemicals through it, and certain chemicals create certain behaviors. Sportsmen, especially those doing well in their sport, are over time becoming more and more tuned in and by their actions training their brains and bodies to respond to dopamine. Dopamine receptors then over time become ready for that next release of dopamine within the brain and that high.

For this reason many sportsmen get into vices, and the easiest most thrilling is unfortunately infidelity…consider it almost an occupational hazard.

And for the record prettiness of the spouse can hardly compete with that longing for the dopamine rush

Curry Favour for Dopamine Dilemma

Continuing Commitment

It’s not about sportsmen not loving their wives, it’s about the ability to continue commitment to not cheat when the dopamine on the brain creates that longing for the high of the dopamine… (which comes from the thrill of daring and challenging cheating)

So Curry favor of continuing commitment is something sports couples cannot take for granted

United Understanding

Steph obviously appreciated Ayesha’s need to build something of her own and what many commenting on the internet are not saying is that for years Ayesha was and has been understanding of female fans being part of the territory

Real Relationship

As mentioned earlier, Ayesha and Curry are childhood sweethearts and it matters. At least Steph knows that his appeal from Ayesha goes way beyond his $$$$ in other words they were able to build something Real before the sports mania female fans.

Sportsmen would want to take time if/when, meeting someone ‘after-the-fact’ to find ways to determine what exactly is making them so appealing

Yearning Yonder

Yes the internet is ablaze now with some comments and so but let’s consider what was and was not said…

Yearning for attention to feel ‘I still got it’ in no way suggests yearning to go free from your spouse…and what many are not saying is that Ayesha still looks forward yonder toward her relationship with Steph and likewise with all the female fans Steph continues to show Ayesha is still the 1

Some Curry favor surely would do more sports couples good even if the woman longs for some more attention now and again

The ‘little magician’ they called him, this Trinbagonian ‘midget midfielder’ who created plays using his smarts in midfield; Russell Latapy. And now he is serving the game as a coach to the Trinidad and Tobago U20 Footballers. Could that be why? why there might be an expectation of …

Sports Producing Actually Magicians!

All of the young men in the U20 T&T Team must have had that desire and include some sort of self-discipline for the players to reach this level

And well after THE LOSS of the game to the USA and watching their chances move away for the bid for another Worldcup, the ‘magician’ coach commented on how goal 6, could have been avoided, with a little more wit from the guys in midfield so we already know that there is no way for this ‘magician mid-fielder coach’ to transfer his ‘magic’ to all his players for them to do the same in midfield. Of course, because each player brings their own uniques skill and traits.

But seems T&T is calling for a different sort of magic???

We have heard that the ‘family that prays together, stays together’… well what about the team that plays together stays together …

Sports Performance …

includes skill and talent [x]

includes internal motivation [ x]

includes autonomy (some measure of control)

includes personal accountability,  assertiveness, sensitivity to feedback (which the coach reports his players as having),

includes the ability to stress manage or control the tension 

includes confidence

Now when a coach claims a team in underprepared and not of the team’s doing, what kind of Sports Psychology is taking place there?

  • It means the external environment is decreasing internal motivation
  • It means the structure around the players is reducing competence and confidence
  • It means the physical, financial and other resources are frustrating resourcefulness

It means that the sporting players are actual magicians if they can overcome that all on an ongoing basis and outperform teams who have and are making use of the support and resources around, like having 5 camps to support performance in a game!

Yet when a journalist laid blame at the feet of a League not waiving registration fees to allow the team to play and thus improve skills … the general focus went to

blaming who? … but the bigger point is/was/remains…

countries with serious sports producing actual magic…

find ways to put things in place to support players in developing their skills and preparing for games/leagues/tournaments

seems though the sort of magic that might be the focus for the T&T players is that kind where we say…

abra cadarba and find things appear from nothing!

It has not happened! It would not happen…because

sports produces practicals …. real day to day things that must be attended to and implemented to support the players and the game beyond mouth praise and tongue-lashing criticisms

and  makes magic …. when sportspersons and systems, systems beyond getting a coach, work together to produce desired performances

;;;;;;;;; so seems it is and would be a tough carry=on for T&T players as long as the mindset remains ah come on, please… go out there and

Start Producing Actual MAGIC!

Sports Performance

One of the things that make sports so demanding is the way it immediately connects the sportsperson’s skills and performance to the results and it all happening before an audience (unlike many other fields)

Another is the fact that the off-field life for sportspersons continue as usual and no matter what is happening the sportspersons are expected to not only carry on but to carry out their objective of excellent performance

So what happens when Sports Persons Are Mourning? 

This is exactly the question that Leicester City club answered for us recently

The grieving process involves denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance…

The Game Goes On! So …

Denial is a no-go at least not to the point where all the reminders of what happened could be avoided…and that’s part of the harsh reality of sports … sportspersons do not have the luxury of avoiding what is happening on the field generally and its the same here … the Leicester City team whether they could believe it or not…would have been moved along the grieving process to face their anger  …

Anger, Aggression and Sports

The good thing here is that as mentioned early sports is about using that energy/arousal/adrenaline to give the best possible performance…and the good thing for the Leicester City team in their time of mourning is that that anger could have been redirected to create a connection with their deceased owner and so even begin in a way a celebration of his life and so help move the team along to acceptance

No change for bargains 

In sports, there is no bargaining without performance. And it would have been the same for this team here, they had no chance to bargain and plea their cause…”please save our beloved club owner’ … it was about performing even in his memory

Sporting as an anti-depressant

Sometimes persons going through the mourning process are misdiagnosed as clinically depressed if the psychologist is unaware of the loss. Sports literally changes our body chemistry by releasing these feel-good hormones. So even if the players have their moments of ‘longing for the past’ (a part of depression) they would not have been able to get stuck there.

Sports is Universal

Groups are powerful. And so too group therapy is powerful, all because the persons realize they are not alone and other persons have felt this and are going through it too. So even playing that game after the loss would have been a sort of group therapy for the team.

Virtue in Sports

Dealing with a loss is a part of life and living. It can happen in any field. The great thing is there are lots of virtue in sports that can help ease the pain and lead o healing, recovery, and celebration of the life lived.

Do look forward to the legacy being carried on in Leicester City 

@and @t KarryOn we support sportspersons to carryon @

So in the Caribbean it finally happened, we got a singing cricketer in DJ Bravo…surprising?

What do Sport and Music have in common?

Energy: sport and music bring with it a certain energy and that really comes from the adrenaline that both give not only to the player/performer but to those enjoying the game/performance

Lyrics: YES! in music it is obvious what the singer is saying and the story they are sharing. In sports what the sportsman or sportswoman is saying to themselves and the story, they are telling themselves only becomes obvious in how they are performing. And this is what DJ Bravo did, simply but a melody and rhythm to what the sports professionals do on the field whether they realize it or not …

Selection: When the musician goes to record they must choose between different songs, melodies and ways of singing their song. Same it is as the sports professional prepares himself/herself for selection for certain tournaments and/or decides to play with one club/in one tournament or another…

Play On: Music or sports we play on and the game continues

and while play continues we are right here to support how the musician or sports professional alike carry on @ #lifecoaching and/or #therapy



As sportspersons step unto their field to play their sport they take with them…

all the off-the-field ideas people hold not only about that sport in general but about them as sportspersons…

and when it comes to women in sports…sportswomen there remains many gender stereotypes that trails the sportswoman…

For sportswomen then DESIRE matters so much

obviously, if a girl or women enter a sport it because she has a desire

but this is happening even as the society has that desire to hold certain thoughts about women…

and for some reason, many of the traits associated with sports tend to be more associated with male traits…

therefore its a different sort of DESIRE that would help sportswomen to reach a certain level of performance whether they are in an individual or team sport…no doubt the Jamaican Women’s Football Team got their DESIRE right

So at the final of the CPL! what makes that difference…

does the best team always win… 

“all-round performance outstanding means nothing in the finals…”

now, why would a renowned sportsman like Brian Charles Lara make such a comment…hmmm…

#sportpsychology …

so can Trinbago Knight Riders

So once calypso, canada and netball comes together it takes me back way way back…

As a Sports Talking Therapist, some sports are definitely more familiar than others…

#netball well that there ‘is my game’ …

what is it about netball that is so great and can give us a good #carryon reminder;

  1. Unlike basketball, once the player catches that ball, then its …..

stop… look around…think fast…make the best choice

and that there is a great approach in the game of life… our ball can be anything…

  1. Once the player moves with that ball the whistle goes…

and often so it is…when we do not take a timeout, no matter how quick, to get a grasp of what is happening, and then making the best choice, well sometimes life finds a way to ‘blow that whistle’

  1. Another great approach is the PIVOT…

sometimes let’s face it we are heading in one direction but realize we need to adjust our position to get to the source/contact/resource that we need to … well in netball, we remain on that foot on which we landed, then take that other foot and use it to pivot and change our course

what a great #carryon reminder that sometimes all we need to do is remain right where we are, using all we have and then work at making a little change

well for sure  these Calypso girls have performed as well as they have by mastering these netball basics and so much more… Kudos to the Calypso Girls 

#lifecoaching online… a great tool to support our ‘pivot’ in some area of our life

… when it comes to this match between Barbados Tridents and Trinbago Knight Riders two psychology terms apply…

  1. Catch “22” Barbados Tridents coming into this game have their history of successes and failures to draw from, in this case, Barbados Tridents have an equal 2 successes and 2 failures, in one case they might decide to focus on their success alone to feed forward, but in so doing they automatically feed from failing since they know that they have lost as much as they have won (in other words they have taken as well as they have give)…
  2. Recency Effect… Barbados Tridents coming into this game with only yesterday having been dealt a defeat… the thing with something happening recently is that if we did not/do not find a way to clear our minds quickly and reboot then it makes it ever so easy to repeat the defeat

so as a Sports Talking Therapist what #carryon tips are there?

when in a catch ’22’ for our best #carryon result we need a ground 0 approach … meaning we focus neither on our victories or failures but instead on the mission, the passion, and purpose of that mission and a strategic plan to get there…  in a nutshell we apply some #lifecoaching for performance (@available @t online office using live chat )

Now as for Trinbago Knight Riders, their history coming into the match was quite different… two psychology terms applied for this team would be…

  1. Self-Efficacy… this team coming into this match would have just gotten a good dose of ‘belief in their ability to get the task done’ having ‘revenged’ a crushing defeat from Jamaica Tallawahs, the thing about self-efficacy is that it helps us keep our positive psychology going, and once we do that we tend to really focus on our strengths and manage our weaknesses to get our best possible results
  2. Rest & Recovery… unlike their counterparts Barbados Tridents having played a match the day before, Trinbago Knight Riders had the opportunity for a 7-day rest & recovery period… like anything else performance keeps at its peak when we have our strategic rest periods…

now as a Sports Talking Therapist, in no way would there be a desire to ‘take away’ from the efforts involved in the Trinbago Knight Riders getting the win, but what we do try to do, is to go behind what might be helping or hurting the sportsmen/women as they take to the field and how this can be applied to the broader game of life…

 Self-Efficacy is something we can coach for… #lifecoaching live chat sessions @vailable @

7 has been called the ‘number of completion’ and for the St. Lucia Stars it took 7 matches to complete the losing streak…

but what is the #carryon we can get here…

  1. with each loss, there would be the need to first reflect then self-soothe
  2. but self-soothing does not give the strength to take the field over and over and over… so there is also that need to re-build self-esteem
  3. even then it would be easy to just give up… but if there is a using of the last experience to find a #carry over into the next match, then it gives a feeling of hope instead of the hopelessness that can come with each loss of a match
  4. and what of all the comments and criticisms coming … sometimes to keep #carryon going we have to filter feedback
  5. but still not enough… for in the game of cricket its a team sport… and so no doubt the team has to find a way to keep the connections going even in the face of conflict
  6. confidence also needs to keep up so practicing and preparing would also be part of taking that field over and over and over in spite of repeated defeats
  7. commitment to the cause… to #carryon we actually have to be determined to #carryon

And what an excellent exceptional win by St. Lucia Stars…

to get their first win not just against anyone but against the Guyana Amazon Warriors …

and so one is left to ask…how does a down & out team find it within itself to beat a winning warrior…

it’s the courage that comes with “yes we can!” when we reach the point in our #carryon when it looks like all hope of a win is lost… we have two choices…either dig into “we can’t” “it’s impossible” or “we can” “anything is possible” … guess which one St. Lucia Stars chose… and so the win comes…

But as for the Warriors how could we explain this… well the thing about #carryon is that even the best among us.. do have our off days… but most important is to pick up and go again as we can be sure Guyana Amazon Warriors would be doing