Moving you forward one step at a time

Stress management

True Story; 

Sitting with this young female client, early 20s, she talks about the different stresses and trying to keep up with her studies, sometimes feeling anxious, but then after a “yuh know” a good smoke “nah not cigarette, don’t deal with that … “marijuana feel so relaxed” but then after it a bit hard to focus and study”

What really would it mean to legalize marijuana? At what age did most start smoking? …

So some had Spain down for the finals…

Some are watching Russia as possible champions…

and now these two teams meet, after having made it through Round 1…

#carryonfact what we might be taking for granted is that to make it this far, these 2 teams must have a decent strategy to handle the stress of sporting competition…

nice so they both come on and do their thing…knowing only 1 only 1 can go forward…

and they darn well play…after all the results show it…its a draw 1 Spain..1 Russia..

And its the same for Denmark …

As it is for Croatia…

4 teams all having the same pre-game experience and coming on that feel and they darn well play…after all the results show it…its a draw 1 Croatia..1 Denmark

now “say what!”


NO…no critique of FIFA …after all what else, we get that

but we looking at some #carryon reality here…

after playing darn hard…after all the work..after years of preps…

going forward comes down to something that is so beyond the team… not true? # one man must take the shot

# any little error/distraction can make the difference

# might just be a matter of who misses first (which it is actually lol)

and then our goalkeeper… “say what!” #the team’s future now lay in his hands literally 


when we played our best …done all we reasonably could have done… know now its out of our hands… we #carryon by keeping clam…then by being kind to ourselves…and then by simply letting it go…

So to all 4 teams great games…but only 2 could move on…

Remembering Spain…Adios Senors

Saluting Denmark (don’t speak Danish)

and if anyone might need a little #performance #lifecoaching chat check us out guys @

1 Comment  Like

The Undervalued Power of Touch

In one way or another at some time or the other, we reach out and touch someone or we are touched by someone, on the field, in the boardroom or even by a passing stranger during our daily hustle and bustle. From early too many of us learn there is ‘good touch’ and ‘bad touch.’ And then there is the downright ‘touchy-feely’ that is associated with certain professions or types of people. But have we ever understood the magnitude of the power of touch?

Touch is so powerful that, Psychology Today notes; “we begin receiving tactile signals even before birth, as the vibration of our mother’s heartbeat is amplified by amniotic fluid.” Even before Birth! How much more then is its power after birth? Yet this is what happens;

‘Touching tends to have become taboo in the American school system and valid fears about abusive forms of touching rightfully limit contact within the classroom.’ (Nicolas Guéguen, Professor of Psychology)

Here we have the harsh realities of our world with the rampant abuse of children by adults causing us to underutilize the power of ‘good touch.’ So we continue to Break the Silence but even so ought we to simply discard the potentials for ‘good touch’?

You decide! More nurturing touch, less violence, was one of 14 many powers of touch noted in this article

The article highlighted that “research shows that when there is greater physical affection during childhood, the rates of adult physical violence are lower. On the other hand, when touch is limited, physical and verbal aggression is higher. The results have been found in both adolescents and children.”

Those words “reach out and touch somebody’s hand, make this World a better place if you can” might be much more that lyrics to a beautiful song after all. Psychology Today also noted, “if touch is a language, it seems we instinctively know how to use it. But apparently it’s a skill we take for granted.”

And the great thing about touch is its mutuality. For example, Field’s research has revealed that a person giving a massage experiences as great a reduction in stress hormones as the person on the receiving end. So it would seem that massage therapy might actually be one of those ways we can make this World a better place not just for one but for all.

Have you ever gotten a massage?

Renowned speaker and life coach Tony Robbins has also chimed in on the power of touch. He wrote in an article

  • Partners who cuddle have been shown to have lower stress levels and blood pressure and improved immune function. 
  • Elderly people who receive the soothing, affirming experience of touch have been shown to better handle the process of aging and passing with dignity. 
  • From the moment we are born to the final days of our lives, touch acts as a central aspect of the human experience — impacting our physical, mental and emotional health, and quite literally shaping the way we go through our lives.

And think about it, with the hustle and the bustle many of us go through our lives tense and on edge, yet what do we do about it? For most of us nothing! Why? All because we undervalue the Power of Touch!

Is there not a better way? Especially when we consider the well documented touch benefits of; reducing stress, communicating compassion, makes you more civil, civic and cooperative, nurtures growth and development, reduces depressive symptoms for Alzheimer’s patients, acts as a source of encouragement, increases our likeability, promotes team success, makes an apology feel more heartfelt, fosters closer intimacy between partners and “Massage therapy reduces the pain in pregnant women, helps to ease the symptoms of prenatal depression and improves the couple relationship.”

Need more be before us before we realize how much we are undervaluing the power of touch? And what are we going to do about it? We can seriously consider our own experience of massage therapy. Taking all those benefits of touch and kneading them right into our life. Those benefits of regular touch that help with our mind body connection and so;

  • Decreases anxiety 
  • Increases the number of white blood cells 
  • Lowers blood pressure 
  • Increases endorphin levels (your feel-good hormones) 
  • Helps you sleep better

Did you know that YOU can have this healing power, literally at your fingertips? When you experience a massage from Sosa Massage Services you are working out that day to day stress and working in that much needed dose of touch benefits. And this is no cheap talk, studies suggest a number of ways touch can help us stay healthy, massage, for example, has been shown to lower blood pressure, slow heart rate and even help premature babies gain weight. And what makes Sosa MASSAGE Services stand out is ‘The Professional Touch’ that keeps getting better with time.

One article noted, “You can’t touch without being touched,” and at Sosa MASSAGE Services the masseuse monitors clients response and feedback and allowing this to truly guide improvements made with each massage allowing that professional touch to keep getting better and better.

Renowned neuroscientist David Linden recently-released book Touch: The Science of Hand, Heart and Mind, explores how our sense of touch and our emotional responses impacts our lives in a very real way. We have a choice to make to value the power of touch and let it impact our lives in a real way for good.

To make that move toward massage therapy contact 1-868-355-1205 Sosa MASSAGE Services.

For long-term wellbeing, touch is as important as food and security.

We need touch, that comfort, that connection, the security and powerful emotional and physical health benefits that come from being touched in safe and appropriate ways. Over and over research has found that the benefits of touch don’t stop at the people we feel safe folding into. Just about one second of safe, interpersonal touch; a hand to the back or on the shoulder can influence health and behaviour in remarkable ways.

Why continue then to undervalue the power of touch.

Studies suggest that psychosocial events (stressors) may play a more significant role in resulting a first episode of Major Depressive Disorder.

The severity of the first Major Depressive Episode appears to predict how persist the Depressive Disorder would be thereafter. 

Natural disasters and traumatic experiences are simply put deeply distressing. If or when we have a tendency or give in to a tendency to long for what has been lost, what once was and might never return again or take an extremely long time to rebuild .. then we add stress upon the stress of dealing with the distressing situation

what happens is that we fight with the present because we insist things should be different

what happens is we despair over the future because we have already decided to some measure it is ruined if it is not a continuation from the past we long for  

since it is virtually impossible to retrieve that which is lost we fall deeper into fighting the present and so these thoughts and feelings lead to changes in how our body chemistry is operating …

over time if this continues our internal systems or biochemistry changes and we begin to require external help to regulate our general low despondent mood .. which might manifest in lack of desire to come out of bed, sadness, irritability, thoughts and feelings of both hopelessness and worthlessness etc.

and by this time its truly somewhat to a major extent biological and truly the behaviours manifested are not the person’s fault … 

yet it all began with the response to a tough tiring draining devastating situation… it began as situational depression

and it is for this reason that it remains imperative that we seek support early personal or professional or both to ensure we are managing our thinking feeling and behaviour tendencies that could cause later long term decreases in our innate internal mental health and wellbeing

From the youngest to the oldest of us experience periods of irritability and usually it is associated with some sort of distress or discomfort

After a natural disaster or traumatic experience it goes without saying that we are more exposed to both distress and also to discomfort and this is on all levels mind body and spirit … so it is no wonder then that part of the post stress response would be irritability 

Hardly can any reasonable person not expect some increased irritability after the experience … however what needs to be monitored and safeguarded against is

Immense Irritability

and this is usually what is referred to as a sign of PTSD ….

it happens when we are simply ‘on edge’ the simplest comment/event/situation might be a trigger

What is happening?

what is happening is that we are overall more emotionally aroused when responding to a trauma or natural disaster meaning …

our experiencing of biological arousal is more .. our thoughts and views on people their responses or lack of responsiveness is heightened  … and we are seeking to make sense of what is happening … we also feel vulnerable … and so it is natural to defend ourselves …

because of all of that .. we are now more easily offended, have less patience with others and general frustrations, and also prefer to label our emotional experiences as ‘anger’ instead of say sadness or fear since ‘anger’ feels and seems less vulnerable and we are trying to defend ourselves from any actual or perceived ‘psyche’ attacks … after all the natural disaster or traumatic experience was already an attack on us of sorts

It helps if ….

we can remind ourselves that we are going to experience a bit more emotional sensitivity for a while … in reminding ourselves of this … we open up the way .. to give different labels to the incoming emotions since we would tend to be more observant .. therefore fear, confusion, sadness can be recognized for what it is and not all just lumped together as ‘becoming annoyed’

for those who might need to externalize or get the emotions out .. journaling might be helpful

and of course use of any therapeutic teas to help with relaxation

but most of all create a stop-gap between the trigger and your response .. so if something happens that leads to a feeling of annoyance … might try counting slowing/ breathing slowing/turning attention to something else … anything that would allow a break to help a return to calm … during the time consider what was the thought you might have had immediately and the ‘jerk’ response and then choose a preferred response

this might have to be an ongoing practice until things settle a bit


Songs get their lyrics and melodies often from the notes picked up from life ….

In relationship songs the artiste has a few minutes to put some aspect of a relationship into a forever relivable melody

Because these melodies can be so infectious and sometimes explore how we feel in the moment we can easily get carried away with the outright and subliminal suggestions in the song

So lets go with “I wish it would rain down”

We all have different associations for the weather.. what the sun means and what the rain means etc.

Now imagine being stuck in one time in a relationship … or being stuck in one phase after a relationship … that RAIN phase …

well be sure that while Phil Collin’s song is a classic for sure

remaining stuck in this phase of remorse and regret … and longing for cleansing and removal of whatever we think we might have done … this rain while might be quite therapeutic at the start …. eventually would only serve to lead us down to despair depression or as some call it “heartbreak hotel” or “tabanca” …

eventually we need some sun to dry up our tears and to do that relationship review looking at our regrets feeling the remorse and then finding the lessons and moving on .. hopefully taking the lessons going forward so we don’t have to sing out loud “I’ll just keep on making the same mistakes, hoping that you’ll understand”  ….

because then it might be that we will once again have to return to singing I WISH IT WILL RAIN DOWN